Doubt...

The decision to leave Chester was a big one, I'm not going to deny that. I knew I'd be unhappy if I stayed, but why am I finding the absence of it more and more distressing? The people I lived with were undeniably amazing, I couldn't of asked for a better bunch of people; I know this because I did spend the first month in a halls where I really would of gone mad!! I enjoyed my time in Chester, I can see that now; but as my boyfriend put it, perhaps I'm missing the time period more than the place and the Uni. All my housemates bar Fresher Jo were postgrads and so moving on anyway - would Chester be the same without them there? Who would I have lived with? Would I feel more comfortable with the person I am in a place that sometimes made me feel so cold? One of my biggest mistakes when starting at Chester was desperately clinging on to what I had at home, a romance that never existed and I think that this may have hindered my over all fulfillment there. I would never of met my boyfriend had I stayed in Chester - in fact with a 7:1 girl:boy ratio I'd of never met anyone of the male variety!!

The course here in Falmouth is at the moment leaving me with a feeling of self doubt, mainly because I can't see how I can tailor it to Public Relations, making me reassess my choices over the last year! Still there are some aspects that I am enjoying, predominently my Photography module, allowing my creative side to come through. I keep thinking I should of gone down the artistic route when I was 17 and got accepted into Plymouth Art College. I wonder how different things would be...a fatal thought!!